Szerintetek ez így helyes? Megteszi egy 9. -es iskolai "make a reservation" fogalmazásnak?

Az eredetivel meglenne a középfokú, 72%-al. De azért a biztonság kedvérét átírtam.

Dear Ms. Weatherby,

In accordance to our recent telephone conversation, I am writing to you to confirm my reservation for myself and five friends of mine for the weekend of 1-3 February.

We will require three twin rooms in total. I would be very grateful if you could provide us with rooms on the ground floor. On the telephone you've mentioned a bus line that passes through the village. Would you mind sending me further information about the bus service?

I am enclosing a cheque for £500 as a deposit. Could you confirm the total amount due, please?

Finally, I would be very grateful if you could e-mail me the directions to your hotel.

I look forward to hearing from you in due course.

Yours sincerely,

Zsuzsa Frenczy